I will be the first to admit, I have zero idea half of what you just typed so I am NOT tech savvy, but I know enough to know that if it is happening across several platforms, devices, it definitely is not a "me" problem, but a "you" problem. "You" being MS if it was hitting that many different brands/systems that require USB to perform then common sense would say it is MS.
I did see someone mention that they also had an Epson and instead of using DanielPratt1's suggestion to click on the HP files to click the Epson files similarly named and others went in and renamed those to begin with "temp", I think? I don't know if you saw that but if you didn't, worth a try.
I think some people think they are smarter than others. Snarky post was simply ridiculous. If they weren't having this issue, how did they land on this page? Lol because they obviously have the issue, the solutions provided didn't work for them so they thought they would throw some shame at the rest of us. Sorry. My tech guy tried many times to get rid of it and couldn't figure it out because the only printer it affects is a laser printer that has no scanner so he was unable to fix it. He had several other companies he contracts with that were having the same issue if the printer was USB connected HP or other brand.
MaryMcIntyre, I hope you are able to find some help on this. I hate that this solution doesn't work for all of us, which is also indicative that it is an MS issue...if we all installed it the software wrong then the one solution should have fixed it, right. ;)
Best of luck and if you are able to get it to quit, be sure to hop back on and let others know what you did!