As of January 4, 2018 Microsoft has released update KB4058702 which should have fixed this issue for all users. I would just like to point out it took Microsoft NEARLY A MONTH to fix this problem from the initial KB4054517 update on December 12, 2017 to the fixed KB4058702 update January 3, 2018. Suffice to say Microsoft's handling of this issue has been reprehensible and completely unacceptable.
For those interested, here's what I think was causing the problem:
On the KB4054517 update page there is a section titled Known issues in this update where Microsoft exactly describes this issue: *"Update installation may stop at 99% and may show elevated CPU or disk utilization if a device was reset using the Reset this PC functionality after installing KB4054022."*Before Microsoft patched the problem in the most recent update they listed a long, drawn-out solution that involved manually downloading update KB4054022 from their update catalog, unpacking it, installing it, and only after that could update KB4054517 be installed (they have since removed the large explanation now with a short statement saying the latest update has fixed this). I know this because I was looking at this page Wednesday night, January 3rd, and by following their steps and installing KB4054022 and KB4054517 I was able to fix my problem. It just so happened that the next day, January 4th, that the patched update was finally released and consequently they webpage was updated (go figure).
From what I understand, there was a problem with a previous update (KB4054022) which was preventing KB4054517 from being installed, likely do to the PC being recovered / reset. I do remember reseting my laptop early on in December even though I had just got it because I had messed up some directory and thought it easiest to reset it. Furthermore, I have two different laptops: an older one which I had not reset in the past month which was able to seamlessly install the update in under 10 minutes, and the newer one which I had reset which was the one experiencing trouble installing the update. If anyone else who was having this problem also remembers resetting their PC sometime recently from the Setting > Update & Security > Recovery menu please share because I'd like to know if this really was causing the problem.
Anyways, because Windows hadn't properly configured an earlier update it was preventing the KB4054517 update from being finalized so the update was basically completed but the installation process never terminated (hence why the update was perpetually stuck at 99% and why some computers seemed to 'detect' that an update was installed but kept on retrying to update). Windows tried to complete the update whenever it rebooted but that same thing was keeping the update from being properly installed so your computer ended up being stuck on loop for hours only to finally start up and say that the update had failed. All of this was causing various problems like insanely large cbs.log files taking up gbs of space (I think mine was 120 gb) and reboot getting stuck at "Getting Windows ready" every time the computer was restarted.
This is probably the best explanation you can expect to see on this issue because we all know Microsoft doesn't have the decency to give its users an explanation for why they had to waste hours of their time trying to fix a bad update. I'm just sorry I had to spend the whole week trying to fix my laptop.