I've finally found a mitigation.. (I still refuse to call this a solution, but I want to share this because it might help someone else)
After having been stuck on this since forever, I've managed to update my setup so I can now use my monitor on 4k60hz
Setup: surface pro 7 => dock 1 (docking connector) => mini-DP male to HDMI female (Microsoft) in dock => HDMI 2.0 cable to monitor (Philips 436m6)
Note: do make sure to use a HDMI cable that you know is capable of giving out 4k60Hz before writing off this workaround.
Sidenote: the only reason I tried this, is because I've lost all faith that anyone will ever provide us with a solution and I was really sick of the driver issues in the november 2019 version. (intermittent black screens when sharing in Teams, pixel-shifts, fuzzy text, etc)
(sold out) connector in question is the Model 1819 Mini Displayport HDMI adapter: Buy Surface Mini DisplayPort to HDMI 2.0 Adapter - Microsoft Store
I still had it in my drawer from a previous surface model, so I didn't have to buy it.. I just spent 4 hours searching for it, but that's on me. Serves me right for not cleaning up after myself.
Honestly, I don't know if this is a vendor specific (Microsoft-connector only) mitigation and I don't have any alternatives to test, but it might be something to to investigate.
I've updated my graphics driver to the following version: 27.20.100.9621 date 15/06/2021