I know I'm frantic because I need that update now, even though I haven't a clue what's in it. I've been sitting idly at this computer for weeks now, losing sleep because the infamous 22H3 isn't showing up as an optional download. I'm not sure how much more I can take before I totally lose it.
Seriously, your statement comes across to me a little different, e.g., "Sorry, I don't understand why you're so frantic about getting a feature update, when you aren't even aware of what the new and updated features are. How do you know they'll matter to you?"
How do you come to the conclusion that one isn't aware of what's in this new update? But then strangely enough, you add "Want to know what's in the update? The details are always published on Microsoft's website: What's new in Windows 11, version 22H2" ... to say one isn't aware of what the new updated features are, is to suggest at least, one hasn't heard this or read this for themselves. Though possible, you cannot make it a blanket statement.
I've got to say, you seem to take offense because some (including myself) have asked regarding 22H2. Hopefully, I'm reading you wrong.
Then you write - "Users who succumb to FOMO lose the benefit of this careful approach, and often end up making posts here where every second word has to be blotted out by the moderators" - this seems more closely related to comedy than being serious, although I think you are trying to be serious.
My advice: if you're not too pleased with some asking about this update, it might be best to leave it be. It's ok! You'll no doubt feel better at the end of the day. ;-)