Thank you for all the effort you've put in, and everybody has, on this thread.
Misery does enjoy company, and I'm in a similar boat to everybody here, with the same update error message, failure of all traditional troubleshooting methods after almost 2 weeks of posting in various support groups with no luck. However, instead of my laptop (ASUS gl732lws) being bricked because of the update trying to automatically force itself and thus using all resources, I had a bunch of drivers and other Windows functionalities simply fail, partially bricking my computer with no function keys, troubleshooting programs that work, or audio of ANY kind. Is anybody else having this specific subset of issues? It seems to all be from the same cause of this update failing to install. I even tried just reinstalling the audio drivers so my computer could function on a basic level but nothing.
I truly don't understand this from a consumer perspective; I'm not technologically ignorant by any means, since I use this laptop for a good portion of the day, and then it just....breaks. Without audio, my laptop is basically at 10% function for my uses, only used at this point for forums and posting while I try to use a tablet for everything. It's very frustrating, and I have no clue where else to go for help for this problem.