how do i COMPLETELY stop my computer from updating!?!?

I think you did not do it right. If you did (disable updates), updates cannot be downloaded and installed. It will not work, that is how it works. What updates are they? You can download the hide and unhide troubleshooter to hide them.

trust me, attempting to disable windows update in services does nothing anymore. their windows update medic service explicitly says its there to enable remediation and protection of windows update components. basically saying, you can turn it off, but we (microsoft) can turn it back on whenever we feel like.

This has been explained here hundreds of times but I don't mind explaining it again.

Windows 10 is unlike previous versions of Windows. In previous versions, you received a baseline version of Windows that was updated over time to fix bugs and improve security.

There is no baseline version of Windows 10. Instead, Windows 10 is a continually evolving operating system that consists of regular updates that will continue indefinitely. The updates are Windows 10, so Microsoft tries to ensure that every Windows 10 computer gets updated. That's why it's practically impossible to stop receiving updates without seriously breaking Windows.

Microsoft explained this while Windows 10 was being developed and it was widely discussed in the media.

Regular updates are particularly rough on two types of user:

1- people who continue to use hardware that is no longer supported by the manufacturer; and

2- people who, for whatever reason, aren't proficient at using a computer.

Microsoft didn't invent the idea of regular updates. Other companies, like Google, had the idea first and with Windows 10 Microsoft has finally come on board.

Windows 10 is the most secure version of Windows. Hackers make a living from people who use outdated software. For people in your situation, here's the best advice:

1- If the manufacturers of your hardware support the hardware on Windows 10, stay with Windows 10. Even if you're like me, who has no interest in virtually every new 'innovation' in Windows 10 and never uses them,  it's worthwhile to stick with Windows 10 for the improved security alone.

2- Do a clean install. Upgrading a computer drags along all the mistakes, problems and inefficiencies of the past, while a clean install gives you a fresh start.

3- Invest the time to learn how to use a computer correctly and wisely. Knowledge is the number one defense against problems. I had to start at the Dick and Jane level - you're probably more advanced - but I'm glad I did because it has paid off nicely.

Regular updates are particularly rough on two types of user:

1- people who continue to use hardware that is no longer supported by the manufacturer; and

2- people who, for whatever reason, aren't proficient at using a computer.

Your impression does not quite agree with my experience. I have seen several fairly recent machines, used for nothing other than MS Office applications, that got badly damaged by automatic updates. Some became unbootable, some kept locking up. Recovery is often impossible for these reasons:

• Automatic Updates routinely deactivate System Restore. Why does MS give us this useful tool, then keeps deactivating it?
• If System Restore points are available, they often do not work. I had two of them this morning.
• Image Restore often fails to work too which is probably why it is now a deprecated tool. Apple Mac users stare in wonder, thinking of their Time Machine.
• Undoing an update, if at all availabe, often fails too, going by forum reports.

In view of this poor track record I have now installed Macrium Reflect on all client machines. It updates its system file image once every month. I should not have to do this.

To the OP: To disable automatic updates, deactivate these two services, then reboot the machine. Note that you will no longer get any virus pattern file updates.

• Windows Update
• Windows Module Installer

Please understand that I don't mean to argue with you. I'm merely illustrating the points I made earlier.

"I have seen several fairly recent machines, used for nothing other than MS Office applications, that got badly damaged by automatic updates."

Are you really in a position to say that no other activity was performed on these machines - literally nothing else - other than signing in and using Microsoft Office applications? I find that difficult.

Let's say, for the sake of argument, that the above is 100% correct. What makes you so sure that whatever problems were caused by Windows and not Office, which gets updated exactly the same way?

Let's again say, for the sake of argument, that Office had nothing to do with the machines' problems. Do you know for a fact that the hardware is supported on Windows 10 - did you ask the manufacturers, who decide whether to support Windows 10 - or are you presuming that the machines should be supported because they are 'fairly recent?' And did you check to determine that the machines are using Windows 10 drivers.

Beyond all that, how would you account for the fact that so many Windows 10 computers are completely up to date and yet have no problems, including my computers?

"Recovery is often impossible for these reasons ..."

First, recovery is always possible by booting the computer from a USB drive or a disk. Doing this is a complete end-run around the hard drive, so it does not matter how messed up someone's copy of Windows is. Your computer could be totally tied up in knots and completely unbootable - which I have done - and yet be restored to working order in little time - which I have also done.

I have yet to have an update deactivate System Restore. What a feature update (translation: new version of Windows) will do, what it's supposed to do, is erase all existing restore points. That's because you don't want to restore a restore point made before the update. That would give your computer a toxic mixture of old and new system files, system drivers and registry hives that is almost guaranteed to crash.

Even at it's best, which isn't saying much (in my opinion,) System Restore was not designed to pull a computer out of serious trouble. Only a backup can do that, and System Restore is not a backup nor was it ever claimed to be a backup. Restore points contain key system files, system drivers and registry hives that were intended to hopefully restore the Windows UI so that users would have access to Windows' own tools to help them solve a problem.

System Restore is turned off by default in Windows 10 (I believe, correction appreciated) because there's a much better way to pull a computer out of otherwise irretrievable trouble: restore a backup. When System Restore was first introduced with Windows ME, home users did not have access to convenient image backup software as we do now. Today there are many excellent third-party image backup applications that make it easy and convenient to backup and restore your entire computer in one shot in just minutes.

Microsoft hasn't said in so many words why they deprecated Windows' own System Image Builder with the Fall Creators Update, but I can take a guess: Like many other utilities that have been included in Windows over the years for no extra charge - like Fax and Scan, Snipping Tool, Voice Recorder, Wordpad, etc. - System Image Builder was not designed to take the place of a full-out third-party application. Rather, these utilities provide a fundamental level of functionality for users who don't know how to install software or are too anxious to try. Considering how much excellent image backup software there is in the third-party space, developed by organizations that specialize in that technology, Microsoft might have said "why try to re-invent the wheel?" Indeed, Microsoft explicitly recommended that users install third-party image backup software.

Thus, Microsoft stopped developing SIB, and that's why it doesn't work well.

Of course, many of the same people who complain endlessly about how terrible Windows is don't backup. They have lots of excuses, even though computer bloggers, teachers, authors and media personalities have been practically begging people for years to backup. When you have an image backup you are as close to bullet-proof as you can be with a computer. In just a few minutes you can send your computer back in time to when everything was fine. But people don't do it.

I'm not claiming that Windows 10 is blameless, not at all. They've got a lot of attitude that needs adjusting. But it's too convenient to blame Microsoft for everything that goes wrong. If you read through the posts in the forum, you'll quickly see that many posters are at the bottom of the barrel in computer skills (and in common sense, in some cases.) Other posters don't think its their responsibility to learn how to use a computer. These people make a mess of things and, of course, they blame Microsoft.

Finding a way to stop updates is not the answer to avoiding computer problems (and the attempt will eventually stop working, anyway.) Learning how to use a computer, just like someone learns how to use a dishwasher, a car, a hand drill, etc., is the answer. And if someone doesn't believe they should have to do that, at least learn how to backup.