The answer proposed by summerfk while not a solution, does make things tolerable in my case. The objective is to get the monitor settings, which WIN7 has decided to change to while you are switched away, the same as the monitor settings you use when you
are switched to the system.
Using VNC (RDP will not work) you connect to system while switched away. In my case, upon connecting i found the monitor was called KVM Monitor and in advanced settings was called a Generic PnP monitor, with max resolution of 1024x768. I first installed my
Dell 2408WFP driver which required a reboot to make it recognized. Win7 still wanted native resolution of 1024x768, but by unchecking Hide all modes the monitor cant display, i was able to force the monitor to 1920x1080. I could not get 1920x1200 so any
window which is near the taskbar will be moved up about an inch, when I return from being switched away. This is much better than the movement/resizing which happened when it was going to 1024x768 while away.
As i stated this is not a solution and you may find it troublesome getting these settings set for your systems, but i will now be able to tolerate Windows7's freaking out because my display has suddenly disappeared, because i have forced those freaking out
settings to something close to my real settings.
At the very least instead of checking this thread twice daily for solutions, I will now check less often. :)
EDIT: This method also does nothing for the occasional time when i switch back, and the resolution is 'stuck' and does not change back to the 1920x1200 which it should be. However again 1920x1080 is not that far from 1920x1200 so it is not a big issue and by
clicking the Detect button it switches properly.