I contacted MS support and they found nothing wrong with my Surface and suggested that it was probably an incompatible monitor, I countered that the Pro 7 must be very picky about which monitors are suitable.
They even removed all the apps (which I had added in 2 days) and saw that the monitor still flickered badly.
This morning the monitor was still behaving badly. I installed the latest updates (KB 4551762). I have version 1909 installed and the update said that fixes from version 1903 were included, I am not sure what those were.
BUT THE MONITOR IS WORKING NOW (so far, for the last hour).